The PM, the CM, and the CPM

While Barfi remains the current flavour of the season as an eternal love story, and the reel life actors Ranbir and Priyanka gather much deserved accolades, in the backdrop, an equally dramatic story unfolds. The real life protagonists are again on the threshold of an excruciating break-up.
According to Industry insiders, Ranbir (Barfi)'s role as a mute guy and Priyanka (Jhilmil)'s role as a mentally unsound woman are inspired from the Indian PM and the WB CM respectively. Whether they manage to stay together till the end or not, like the lead pair of Barfi, is of course yet to be seen.
While didi is hell-bent on teaching the poor mute guy a lesson or two because of him treating her like shit, and not consulting her, on each and every miniscule government policy he decides to embark upon, the poor mute guy has yet again resolute to stay mum.
One needs to sympathise with him, I mean I do, always. It’s so tough for a man to manage two women at a time. (Well, I have failed miserably, whenever I have tried to do so). And, let’s face it, he’s no Ranbir Kapoor.  One of the women, the dominating Italian one, has her fingers always on the remote, and that’s why probably, poor guy has forgotten to emote. The other one, is the typical, Bong romantic melodramatic girl, madly seeking love and attention and threatening to slit her wrists open, whenever poor guy showers more attention to the other lady.
72 hrs is what she has in her mind right now. Come Friday, and we are yet to expect another Friday blockbuster. Till now, I have seen only stupid looking doctors in Bollywood movies say, “We cannot say anything before 72 hrs.” She needed to buy time till Friday, because she wanted to read the Namaaz on a Jummabar and then proceed with the formalities of the Talaaqh modus operandi. A very cheaply pulled publicity stunt, on an endeavour to hit a chord with the minorities. But who cares, the Minority vote bank absolutely adores this proclamation of hers. Okay, you get the gimmick, and even I get it, but a 50 something farmer, rearing his cattle beside a paddy field, Saifuddin Molla from the Chhoto Angaria village, will not get it. And there is the point where she wins. And Gautam Buddha cannot do a rat’s ass about it. Okay, no secular undertones, I am talking about Gautam Deb and Buddhadeb Bhattacharya here.
Just when our state was basking in the glory of the 46 Dengue deaths ( Official figures – 6, the rest are due to heart attacks and liver failures) and the Rape cases ( I lost count, do anyone have a latest figure?), she decided to pull out a bigger rabbit from the hat, the Breakup trick, which she has mastered by now (1993 – PV Narasimha Rao led Cong Govt,  2001 – Vajpayee led NDA Govt and now 2012 – MMS led UPA2 Govt)  , making Dengue and Rape look like second fiddles. In all these years, Her parties change, her Coalitions change, the Prime ministers change, but she, the Rebel does not. Everyone who takes her as an ally in a coalition knows on the back of their minds that, she will pull the plug, sooner or later. Most people have a BCP for that. Just like UPA2, is now banking upon the SP and/or BSP to pull them through. And it is just a matter of time and a few thousand crores in which a pact will be signed with either of them by the UPA2 , to sail them through  till LS Polls 2014.   Of course the media loves her; she is their bread and butter. Who cares about the fat old Pawars, Jayalalithas and the Karunanidhis these days? Everything comes down to ‘her vs the PM’ or ‘her vs the CPM’.
And here is where CPM finds itself landing in a soup. They were shouting on top of their voices to rollback diesel prices and subsidize LPG cylinders and scrap FDI in retail for days now and even called up a Bharat Bandh. And the aam aantel Bong, raised their eyebrows again, thinking – “Ohh these stupid commies, always finding a pretext not to work”. Now the didi stunt has made the Politburo think-tank (what they think, generally tanks) feel like a grumpy kid, whose pie has been stolen. The bandh is no longer the talking point of the town, and now, the arch-enemy herself has taken their own stance. Where to go now? They cannot go to Congress, as they are fighting with the UPA2 government. They cannot go to the BJP, as the ‘Secular’ tag is pricey. With didi joining hands for a 3rd front with Mulayam and co. even that door seems to be bolted. And with the Anna and Kejriwal rift even that movement is now seems like a fleeting glimpse.
What Bengal stands to gain through this will be a thing to see in the future, but without the support from the centre, I feel so sorry about the current plight of the millions of Bongs who had voted for her, expecting her to work closely with the centre and bail them out from the financial pit the commies had made them dive into, the last 34 years.
Allah Miya save the Bongs ( pun intended, minority readers will love it)

Hemlock Society - The Review

HEM’LOVE’ SOCIETY
The inevitable stumbling block that Sreejit Mukherjee encounters, every time his movie hits the screen, is an overwhelming baggage of expectations. It all started with Autograph, which changed the way the intellectual Bengali mass expected Bengali commercial movies to be. Of course, I use the word commercial when it comes to Sreejit’s movies. They are nowhere to be confused with art house movies, nor can they be termed as parallel movies. They have the routine song sequence, the big production house backing, the overtly done promotion, the presence of the biggest superstars of the industry.
So, what makes Sreejit’s movies still fall into a genre different from the regular ‘Paglu’ and ‘Khokababu’ movies? It’s his treatment which makes him stand apart from the regular league of commercial masala Bengali movies. He uses a similar starcast which the masala movies use, but he manages to churn out a different product altogether. He never tries to overdo the things, strikes a vivid balance between intellectualism and commercialism and scores big brownie points doing so.
Coming back to his latest release ‘Hemlock Society’, Sreejit had to break some rules and conventions. He was under the pressure of delivering a hattrick of hits, and to prove a thing or two to his critics as well. Given the fact this was not a Pujo release, unlike Autograph and 22she Shrabon, which kind of would have cemented a Hit Tag even before the movie releases. Moreover, there ain’t no Bumba da this time, who has the uncanny reputation of pulling out a movie single handedly, and steal the limelight. Sreejit casted Koel, an out and out masala movie heroine who has so far done nothing than singing and dancing in exotic foreign locales, as the female lead. He also casted Parambrata as the male lead, who so far has been excellent in cameos but he hardly is a lead material.  So, rules were broken, conventions were shattered, and few myths were to be proved wrong.
The Movie opens with the break-up of Meghna’s (Koel) 14 year long relationship, as she sees her boyfriend in the act with another woman. She has a troubled family life too, with her father Chitto (played by Dipankar to perfection) marrying Niharika (Rupa Ganguly, looks lovely as ever) who is the tragic bitch stepmom, with whom she does not gel at all. Adding to it, is her workplace problems, from where she is gonna be fired soon, because of her devil-may-care attitude and torn jeans.
Reason enough for attempting suicide? She thinks so, and she ventures out in the dead of the night  for a cliché-style suicide mission by buying a bottle of sleeping pills. As chance had it, the male protagonist Anondo Kar (played by Parambrata  – the character name part symbolic, part oxymoronic ) bumps into her at the med store, very bollywoodishly and decides to help her out – No, not by convincing her to dump her suicide attempt, but by assisting her to take the bold step, without making a mess out of it –  summarizing the motto of his establishment – Hemlock Society – Morle Moro, Chhoriyo naa..
Parambrata comes out as an ensemble of Bollywood romantic heroes – a mix of yesterday’s Rajesh Khanna of Anand, with an overdose of Babumoshai  meets today’s Shahrukh Khan of Kal Ho naa Ho, effortlessly flirting with Koel, in the same time, helps her to complete her suicide mission by enrolling her into Hemlock Society. An inherited rich guy, who drives a BMW convertible, and runs a Suicide Workshop in the guise of a Film city in the suburbs, Parambrata does a great job in bringing out the multiple shades of his character. His dialogues are coated with wit as he says he is looking for a woman je ‘Feluda jaane, Neruda jaane, aabaar Derridao jaane’
The 2nd half of the film revolves around many cameos, who all are the lecturers and students of the different  courses the society offers specializing in various methodologies of suicides. The naming of the characters is very neatly done, with names like ‘Dhamani’ as the one who specializes in splitting wrists, ‘Setu’ as the one who specializes in jumping of a bridge and so on. Sreejit manages to gather a bunch of very talented veterans like Soumitro, Sabitri and Sabyasachi as well as people from theatre and all possible other fields like Bratya Basu, Shilajeet, Raj Chakraborti, Priyanka etc  to do these short 5 mins cameos, and boy, did they do justice to their small roles. Worth mentioning is Bratya Basu’s role as Raktim Ganguly who specializes in shooting oneself. Shilajeet does a great job with his bringing up of an artist’s dilemma when his best days are over, ala Cobain style – “It’s better to burn than to fade away”. Priyanka shines as ‘Hiya’ - a teenage girl forced to prostitution. In the midst of all these happening, Koel founds herself fallen for Parambrata, and realizes that she no longer wants to die, but with her new found love, she wants to live again for the worldly things like Phuchka khawa, ghurte jawa, Sachin’s batting etc. Out comes the ‘typical Sreejit twist’ when she discloses this to Parambrata . What follows is a sea of emotion between the 2 leads and a very nicely done ending.
The music of this movie is quite good, if not as good as Autograph and 22she Shrabon, but definitely hummable. Shilajeet’s jazz and blue ‘Jawl Phoring’ and Rupam’s signature style ‘Phiriye dewaar gaan’ are the pick of the pack.  But, somehow I felt, the songs did not fit as good as it should have been in the moments.  The surprise package of this movie is obviously Koel, who did a great job as the geeky introvert intellectual girl, a remarkably different kind of role she has done so far. This could well become a turning point in her career if she wishes to continue with meaningful cinemas. Parambrata is excellent, and his dialogues and punchlines, sudden one liners and intelligent/intellectual talks keeps viewers engrossed. Overall, you may like this movie or not, but you would appreciate the treatment - The honesty coupled with intellectualism put into correct doses in this movie, making it so easy to watch, though it deals with such a dark and morbid subject – Suicide.
For me, it rocked, and I was not so sure, when I left the theatre, whether I liked it or not, but as 24 hrs pass, I realize that I really loved the movie. Congrats Team Sreejit, you have done it again. A Hattrick of hits for sure.

Crazy Cricketing Country...!

100th ton... phew...!!! What a dramatic (read melodramatic) event ...
So, the Little Master has proved once again that Gods cannot go wrong...no, at least not in India...
Even if they do so, we are not standing by to acknowledge the straightforward object that they are mere humans and they are bound to have their share of ups and downs.
Ok, I absolutely agree that 100 tons is not a joke..in any format of the game.
It is almost humanly unattainable to score a 100 tons even in para cricket. Agreed..!
But, that also doesn't rob my right to disparage Mr.God, when I have legitimate grounds to do so.
Its ok for him to take one full year to reach from the 99th ton to 100th ton, but its not at all ok for young Manoj Tiwary.
So what if you scored an unbeaten hunderd in the last ODI u played for India,dude ? So what if you regurarly hitting centuries and double centuries in First class?
You have to make way for the God... he has a God Quota in the team...! He never is dropped, He just takes rest in the series he does’nt wanna play. He might well decide to play 2015 and 2019 world cups, and you cannot do a damn thing about it.
An Asia cup Win can wait for the next time.. Scoring the ton'th ton (a 114 from 147 balls against Bangladesh with a S/R of 77) is far more a bigger headline. Poor Pranab Mukherjee’s budget almost went unnoticed in the next day morning daily. (Pranab’s not quite unhappy though, he’s a bit relieved actually that Mr.God stole the limelight and the discussion for the next couple of days will probably involve less of his arse)
And after India being unceremoniously ousted from the tournament, we get a fine first reaction from the master "Virat is a great player, but Don't put pressure on him".
Talking about pressure and match winning abilities, 10 out of Virat's 11 ODI tons has resulted in India's victory. And 7 of them were run chases.
And still, I cannot even think to compare Virat to Mr.God. So even if you have 11 tons already in 85 ODI's, you can never be compared with Mr.God who had just a maiden ton in the same number of matches. You are just going through a fine phase, a learning curve.
You are just a match winner, he's a God,dude... Grow up...!
Ok, enough.. no more cynicism with Mr.God..and no more statistics...coz if the God bhakts starts throwing their share of Stats.. like Matches played, number of international years of cricket, Runs scored I will almost certainly need a cave to hide in Afghanisthan.
Leave Virat, he’s just a kid...you cannot even compare him with Viv,Ricky or Brian. Once a while someone makes the audacity of saying that “Ponting is the most complete batsman I’ve ever seen”, just to supplement with a small disclaimer,” after Tendulkar”, basically to avoid any non-compliance.
Oh yes, you can jolly well compare him with Sir Bradman. Mainly because nobody in our generation, or our father’s have seen him play, and secondly the magic average of “99.96” somewhat gives him the SuperGod quota.
Coming back to what made me spit venom on Mr.God was because of the time I started admiring Dada. Ok, now I know there is a Bong Connection and I you may think I have a 1% extra biasness for him on the lingo ground. But this also conradicts the fact that I prefer the Gujju Dinesh Trivedi to the dickhead Bong Mukul Ray as the rail-minister . Got my point? So leave aside any thought of Bong Bhalobasha.
I have always loved aggression,attitude and fearlessness in the field. That is why I probably admire Ricky Ponting and in fact the Aussie Team a lot. We cannot go on saying Cricket is a Gentleman’s game in this timeframe where T20’s is the reigning format. And the turning point in Indian Cricket came under Dada’s regime.
At a time when world class cricketers like Prabhakar,Mongia,Manjrekar,Azharuddin had successfully gangraped Indian Cricket, Dada came and took the reigns. He got onboard few unheard,unknown faces in his side and basically he made a presentable bowling line up with Zaheer,Harbhajan,Irfan. With Yuvraj and Kaif at point and cover, a decent fielding side was created. Add to it, he had the Wall and Mr.God with him. A dream team –. An aggressive leader, with a fine balance of youngsters and veterans, he turned the “indian Cricket Team” to “Team India”. He somehow broke the myth of “Tigers at backyard, Rabbits overseas.” In the midst of his leadership skills, many tend to overlook the fact that he was the finest batsman in India at that time. Yes, he reached the quickest 6000,7000,8000,9000 runs in ODI, when he was playing at his peak. Yes, quicker than God.. Godspeed, did u say ?
Matchwinner?
18 of Dada’s 22 ODI tons has resulted in India winning the match. (82%).
Lara: 19 ODI Centuries, 16 times West Indies won. (84%),
Jayasuriya: 28 ODI centuries, 24 times Srilanka won. (85%).
And the list is pretty huge, with players like Shewag,Yuvi, Anwar, Astle etc (people having scored sizebale number of centuries) in ODI’s has a better ton-to-win average than Sachin’s meagre 67%.
Anyways, my point is that even I agree that Sachin is the greatest cricketer the world has seen.
But, there were times when Lara was better than him, when Ponting was better than him, when Dada was better than him. And we should accept it.
There are times when one should realize when to hang up their boots and call it a day. What more does he need to acheive?
Highest number of runs in any format of the game – Unbreakable
Longest international career – Unbreakable
Most number of matches – Unbreakable
Most tons – Unbreakable
Most number of MoM and MoS – In the kitty
World Cup win – Done
100 100’s – Acheived.
Once a while, there’s a retortion from him stating “Will stop playing the day I feel 1% less committed to the game”, which basically translates to “It’s my freaking decision when to quit, and you don’t have a rat’s ass say in that, whatsoever”. Even if fans throughout India feel that scoring that century against Bangladesh came with a selfish strike rate.
Sir, Do not become another Kapil Dev, who played and played the fag end of his career, all broken and dry, just for thesake of breaking Hadlee’s record. And moreover, you do not have any other record to break, they are all yours. Now if you have Lara’s 400 in Tests or Shewag’s 219 in ODI,in your mind, just to have all the possible records in the book under your name, then poor Manoj, am sorry... you are in deep trouble.
Dear Mr.God, I have written many unpleasant things about you, without even having a minimum qualification or knowledge in Cricket to do so, but, as a one time huge fan of yours, I have just one advice/request for you . “Retire with grace,Sir... we all love you”